Feeling Stuck? Here's How to Move Forward and Create a Life You Love
Listen to the podcast here
Do you feel like you're not where you're supposed to be in life? Like something’s holding you back, and you're not sure which direction to take? You're not alone. Many of us in our twenties, thirties, and even forties feel confused and overwhelmed by our career paths and life choices. You might feel stuck, lost, or unexcited about where you're headed. Negative thoughts flood your mind, making it seem like you're not in control of your own life. Whether it’s money, a job, relationships, or a past choice weighing you down, it feels like something is limiting your options, leaving you indecisive and scared.
Identifying the Root of Feeling Stuck
When life feels overwhelming, it’s essential first to identify why you feel this way. Often, it's not just one thing but a combination of factors. Whether personal, professional, or both, these feelings can deeply impact our mental and emotional well-being. Let’s break down a few reasons that could be behind your stagnation:
1. Burnout or Overwhelm: Big changes or demanding careers can leave you feeling like you're not in control. You're exhausted from trying to juggle it all and unsure where to focus your energy.
2. Boredom: Maybe you’ve been doing the same job or been in the same relationship for a long time, and now you're craving something new. It doesn't mean you should blow up your entire life, but it might be time for a shift.
3. Uncertainty and Fear: Sometimes, you feel comfortable but stuck, afraid of the unknown. Fear of the future can keep you in your comfort zone, holding you back from making positive changes.
4. Fear of Loss: You worry that change means giving up something valuable, like job security or predictable schedules. But the truth is, you can hold on to the things you love while still moving toward your desired life.
5. Fear of Judgment: Are you placing too much weight on other people’s opinions? This can kill your motivation. Your life decisions are yours, and listening too closely to what others think may steer you away from what will truly make you happy.
6. Indecision and Overthinking*: Spending too much time considering every option and outcome can lead to paralysis. Comparison to others also adds to this indecision, leaving you working toward goals that aren't truly your own.
7. Lack of Purpose: Feeling like your life has no meaning or direction can leave you feeling lost. A sense of purpose gives your decisions weight and makes your goals feel attainable.
Quiet the Noise and Reflect
Before you take action, I encourage you to pause and reflect. Take a break from the chaos, from other people's voices, and focus on what you truly want. Define success on your own terms. Ask yourself these questions:
What area of life feels the most stuck?
What does your ideal life look like?
What’s holding you back from achieving your goals?
What fears are driving your indecision, and where do they come from?
What small steps can you take to start making progress?
Self-reflection is crucial. A few months ago, I went through this process myself after feeling stuck, not just in my career but also in my personal life, especially after a breakup. I realized that if I didn't define what truly mattered to me, I'd continue living on autopilot.
Taking Small Steps
Massive, sudden changes aren’t for everyone, and if the idea of upending your entire life gives you anxiety, start with small, manageable changes. Set achievable goals that build confidence and create momentum. For example:
If you're feeling isolated in a remote job, try working from a local coffee shop a couple of days a week.
Interested in a career shift? Enroll in an online course to build skills in that new area.
It's okay to start small. The important part is taking that first step.
Overcoming Fear
Fear is a natural part of change, but it doesn’t have to paralyze you. Acknowledge your fears, and then challenge them. Afraid of losing security? Remember that positive changes can happen without sacrificing what you value. Fear of judgment? Most people are too wrapped up in their own lives to focus on yours. As the saying goes, “people are thinking about you far less than you think.”
Real Talk: My Journey of Making Friends in My Late 30s
I recently faced a challenge that I never anticipated—making new friends in my late 30s. After a breakup and a wave of my closest friends moving away, I found myself lonely and disconnected. Rebuilding a social circle felt overwhelming, and I had to push myself out of my comfort zone to meet new people. I signed up for social events, said "yes" to invitations I normally wouldn't, and created a weekly habit of reaching out to new and old friends. It wasn’t easy, but it paid off.
Opening myself up to new experiences—and even the discomfort they brought—allowed me to meet new people, reconnect with old friends, and create new, meaningful relationships. It also reminded me how important it is to **push past discomfort** and trust that new opportunities will arise if I allow them to.
Trust Your Intuition
One of the most powerful tools in decision-making is your intuition. It provides insights you might not reach through logic alone. Intuition isn’t wishful thinking—it’s a deep knowing that can guide you when you’re feeling stuck. Trust that gut feeling and lean into it.
Make the Change, No Matter How Small
Whether it’s picking up an old hobby, setting boundaries at work, or opening up to new friendships, remember that small changes can lead to significant shifts. You don’t need to wait until you hit rock bottom to make improvements. Start where you are, with what you have, and watch the path unfold.
It’s time to get unstuck and start creating the life you want. You’ve got this.